Wanna be gay? There’s a tax for that.

So just out of curiosity is it wrong that I don’t feel like a victim because I’m gay?  I don’t have to ride in the back of the bus. I can vote. I can drink from whatever water fountain I want. Do I need to start searching out ways to be discriminated against?  Should I feel a little more put upon by the world?

Dude… brah…

In my 29 years on this lonely little planet I’ve dabbled into just about every social scene – Or dated someone from every social scene rather (who you callin a HO?).  The only thing I’ve never delved into were the Dude/Bro’s.  Dude/Bro’s have always fascinated me, but I’ve never been cool enough to be one.  Or built enough, rather.  Ever since I went all anorexic and lost my baby weight my junior year of high school I’ve been a twig.  No muscle definition, some gushy parts… not terribly fit.  Things have changed now since the community rec center is only […]

Fighting for the Ectasy Army by way of the Hallucinogen Platoon…

Tonight I witnessed a murder.  It actually happened Saturday night but I saw it on TiVo today.  The victim was music, the culprit: Pop singer Ke$ha.  Just another example of the music industry taking someone with a shred of talent and trying to juice every single dollar they can out of them before throwing them back to the real world where they can either get work on a celebrity dating or rehab show or get a job sacking groceries at the buy and bag.

When I’m 35 he’ll be 55…

I’m getting to that age when all the young guys are starting to think I’m sexy, and that’s a bit scary to me.  I’m always meeting guys in their 40’s that have hot young 22 year old boyfriends and as horrible as it is I can’t help but wonder exactly how long will it last?

Dirty Laundry…

Damn bad parents… Saturday morning at the Laundromat is always guaranteed to be interesting.  There were very few machines open so after walking around the 2-3 loaders for a few minutes I broke down and threw all my stuff in one giant industrial 4-load washing machine.  I usually hate to do that but really none of my clothes are very vibrant anyway so if I have to do one giant load every few loads I think the queen will survive…

Oh the things that go through an insomniac’s brain…

As I’m sure you’ve gathered already sleep doesn’t come easily for the DUNDERBRAIN.  As soon as one of my personalities falls asleep another wakes up sometimes and then there’s no hope for sleep.  As with many insomniacs when I try to sleep often I get little songs stuck in my head or images will play over and over like a bad film reel.  Last night though was truly awful.  There was clown porn playing in my head.

Person #1

Today I filled out my US census form.  I gotta say, the thing cracked me up.  It’s like the thing was written by idiots to confuse idiots, even I got a little confused and I’m just slightly idiotic.  I can at least read.  I can imagine what a time this must be for some households though.

Where are these children’s owners???

So the other day when I was at the Laundromat as I usually am several times a week a little girl came toddling up to me.  Kids that I don’t know make me nervous because really people don’t know how to discipline their children.  I mean what would happen if she came up and snatched my phone and threw it across the room?  It’s not out of the realm of possibilities, people don’t teach their children boundries or personal space anymore.  Anyway, they make me nervous.

SUMMER

It’s almost here folks, we had a screwed up winter but SUMMER IS NEARLY HERE!  We’re already seeing 80 degree days here in Texas and the rest of the US of A is catching up as well but really, who gives a shit?  TEXAS is the place to be in the summer.

ahhhh damnit, not again…

That’s right folks, it’s that time of the year again.  I just finished surfing through the last year in the archives trying to dig up stuff for the Untitled Jt DUNDERBRAIN! Project due out next year and I realized “crap – it’s time for white trash week again.” There are no specific dates that White Trash Week must take place on except it has to be in the spring after it gets warm enough to sit on the trailer steps in your wife beater but before it’s river tubing season s0 I’m officially announcing it for April 20-27.  I haven’t […]