[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7urc4KrB8Nw&hl=en&fs=1&]
The Peace Prize, Really???
The past few months have been a total whirlwind for me – I’ve lived in New York, I’ve moved back, I’ve shifted around like a vagabond, I’ve gotten moved into a new place with a new roommate, I’ve quit smoking, and took over three small third world countries. “Nuff said. Anyway, so much has been happening in our world that I haven’t even been able to keep up with it. For instance – Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize? What the eff? For what? See, this is why politics suck ass. I really really want to like this man. And […]
This Season So Far…
Episode 1 – The Daisies Don’t Smell So Sweet Anymore… The season begins with our Hero, Justin Thyme, returning from spending the summer at an opera camp in Upstate New York. On his arrival he discovers that his roommates are not only moving out – they’re moving out RIGHT NOW. He’s given three weeks to find a new apartment with his long time friend Eric as things begin to get heated on the home front. Justin and Eric find a great apartment except there’s one catch – it won’t be available until the 12th of september and he has to […]
That’s Enough, Fred Armisen.
To start off, I haven’t watched Saturday Night Live in YEARS. Last night as I watched the season premier (I think it was, at least. I dunno I don’t watch the crap.) remembered there was a REASON I haven’t enjoyed a sketch on SNL since the good old days when SNL had actual TALENT on their show. The episode started off with some douche-bag who can’t act, Fred Armisen, doing the worst impression of Obama that I have EVER seen. He did NOTHING besides dress in a suit and highly offensive black face makeup to suggest he was trying to […]
The Vice
I I was born in 1980, a time when you could still smoke in the mall, restaurants, wal-mart – I think by that time people had pretty much laid off smoking in doctor’s offices but everywhere else was pretty fair game. Both my parents smoked. Hell, EVERYBODY smoked. It was fun, cool, smooth-tasting, and got you a SHIT TON of “poon tang”. Everyone always told me not to smoke, but it was really like sitting on the edge of the skating rink while everyone, literally EVERYONE is skating and having fun, dipping over to you every time they pass to […]
I carry on and on and on…
Here I sit in an anonymous library in an anonymous town somewhere far away from the close comforts of the 50 people I spent the last three months coexisting with. Its like I’m one of those abductees that take forever to readjust to life in the free world. Except I enjoyed my captivity. Now that I’m back though it’s like watching a season premier of your favorite TV drama. You know, you watch the premier and say “what the eff, everything is different now!” Like to start, the producers of my little sitcom show of a life have me carrying […]
Hungover Babble…
First off, can I say how much youtube is starting to SUCK ASS since everybody and their mom has a guitar/keyboard/ukulele/kazoo and a built-in webcam in their pretentious little macbooks (I say that because I’m jealous and want one. I want to be pretentious too…). It’s next to impossible to find a real video of a real song, everyone has a crappy little cover of someone else’s song that they’ve posted up on the youtube, especially weepy whiney singers like Tori Amos and Ani Difranco… who I admittedly love and want to watch videos of all the time. I could […]
LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!! Seriously, leave that ho alone…
Last week I posted a blog about my internet dating experience and what a crapchute the websites I’ve tried are. Match.com is a scam, I swear there’s no real matching involved at all because I recognized people they’ve tried to set me up with and believe me when I say they WOULDN’T be a good match. Eharmony is a bunch of bigoted nazis (which, by the by, has now created a site called “compatible partners” which just screams memories of the “Lowered Expectations” skit from MADtv…). I thought PlentyOfFish.com might pan out to be interesting since it’s not some huge […]
Syphilis? Really??
Tonight marked the beginning of my labor with our final show here. I got back to Wig World where I live during the show and one of the singers was sitting in the chair at my station with a chi straightening iron and a head full of tight curly hair. There was still about an hour until they were supposed to be on stage so she asked me to straighten her hair – which I had never done in my entire life. I had a flat iron like 6 years ago I’d use on my own board straight hair to […]